Please Notice Me

This is one of the most ridiculous things I've read in a while: Agencies slam branding of $700 billion bailout plan. Seriously? Better 'branding' would have made this plan more appealing to Americans who are watching their retirement accounts and home equity evaporate? Maybe a logo and tagline slapped on it would have made all of those Bear Stearns employees feel a little less stung as they carried their belongings out of their offices for the last time. Honestly, I think that Wall Street and Main Street are only separated by the absence of a clever positioning statement.

And who better than a bunch of advertising agency people to take care of it? Hopefully, the new president, who seems to be very bright and capable, will take some of these wizards and put them in some cabinet posts so they can bring their un-self-importance and wide vision to the issues. I brand them patriots. I brand myself a sarcastic ass.

Here's a crazy idea...

Why not start charging a premium for placement of shitty creative, whether online or offline, traditional or emerging? That way, really good stuff, stuff people enjoy and happily engage with is cheaper (even free?) and easier to place in front of people. And they'll see value in it being there.

On the flip side, lousy stuff — the kind that makes people change channels and leave web sites — would cost a ton and be more difficult to put in front of people. You know, put a little burden on the marketers and advertisers of the world to really think about the consumer (of media, and goods and services) as opposed to just themselves?

For instance, as the creator and owner of Office Space, I'm going to charge Swiffer extra money to show that stupid commercial with a broom sending flowers to a woman at home ...make them pay for the privilege of driving away my hard won viewers.

On the flip side, maybe I'll charge Apple less because their spots keep my viewers interested and actually make a little sense in terms of the content of my show. So, they help me keep my viewers engaged and entertained. How about that?